Think about how you celebrate your birthday. What comes up for you? The range of emotions we have about celebrating our birthdays is quite varied and extreme. For some they seize the opportunity to be the centre of attention, tell everyone it’s their birthday and party up like there’s no tomorrow. Yet for others – they want to hide away like a church mouse, feeling shame of getting another year older, or that another year has passed and things in their life are … just the same as they were the year before. A stark and devastating reminder of those dreams that never quite materialise – just beyond ones grasp. If any of that resonates with you and you want to feel more love, joy, fun and connection on your birthday then read on.
Personally I always felt quite ashamed of my birthday. I didn’t like all the attention, feared no one would rock up to my parties, felt unworthy of gifts responding with “no you shouldn’t have…that’s too much, I can’t accept that”. And, fearing all the shitty parts of my life would still exist a few years on, like dirt you can’t seem to wash off your life. But this year I’m consciously doing things differently to have a fuller more colourful life and I decided for my birthday I’d make it a birthday month and this what I did:
I decided how I wanted to feel and set an intention. Love, relaxation, acceptance and connection is how I wanted to feel over birthday month. I designed activities from this place of being. And opportunities started to open up.
I journaled and got coaching on anxiety and old stories as they came up over the month. Acknowledging how you are feeling and not judging it as wrong is very powerful because you can maintain a rationale mind and see things objectively. How you think determines how you feel and the subsequent actions you take can move in the direction you actually want to go. Meaning next year you’ll have less shitty habits and celebrate your manifested dreams. I stopped judging myself and feeling shitty – because isn’t the purpose of birthday month to feel awesome about ourselves, not shitty?
Ask yourself if there is evidence [insert your story here] exists. So for me, I had a story that no one would want to come to my party, or enjoy hanging with little old me. But when I looked at this with a rationale mind – I realised that wasn’t the case at all. Sure, there were people who didn’t RSVP or rock up. But I now believe that those who want to be around me and feel joy, love and fun will show up and they are the people I want in my life. Those who are meant to be there will appear – the right people for you, at this point in your life, will show up. I just cast a net over my friendship group – reconnecting with people I haven’t seen for over a decade – and waited to see who would emerge from the shadows. It’ll surprise and amaze you shows up and how much love you can feel.
As we near the end of June – I am exhausted and a little fatter – but feel full of love, joy and know that when I create spaces for others to come together and celebrate life – it’s not only my soul that gets nourished, but others as well.
So be generous and gift your birthday positive vibes to others.